Cornerstone Church With Dustin Bates

Blueprints | A Healthy Family's Code For Care

The final week of our series:

Blueprints: God’s Design for Church and Family
Week 1: Blueprints for God’s Design of Family

A Healthy Family is God’s Blueprint for human flourishing

• Individuals and the church

Week 2: Laying The Foundation For Healthy Families

Biblical Values form a strong foundation for healthy families

Week 3: Quality Framing for Quality Families

Christian Maturity is the quality that sets apart healthy families

This series has been about…

What works for YOUR FAMILY works for the church family

What works for the CHURCH FAMILY works for your family

 

Our “HOUSE” is almost complete

There is one last thing before it’s complete…
A final walk-through INSPECTION

• Picks out things that may have been missed
• Things that were done wrong

 

The Importance of a BUILDING CODE

Sets a standard of EXPECTATION

• Same as a job code of conduct
• etc

When things aren’t done to code, the LOWEST BAR becomes the standard

• Dangerous
• Cheap
• Lazy way out

 

A house built to code is a safe home

A Safe Home is a GOOD HOME
The same happens in our relationships

When codes differ, disappointment is always the result
Let’s not just think about what a code “IS”

But what a good code LEADS TO

 

Let’s think about it this way…

A Proper CODE leads to PROPER CARE

• It makes sure things are safe

 

Today, we are talking about:

A Healthy Family’s Code For Care

 

<PRE VERSE CONTEXT>

Corinthians were a mess…

• In a very pagan city
• Primary God was a sex deity
• Struggling with maturity
• Arguing over meaningless things…

 

Paul writes…

1 Corinthians 12:12-21

12 For just as the body is one and has many parts, and all the parts of that body, though many, are one body—so also is Christ. 13 For we were all baptized by one Spirit into one body—whether Jews or Greeks, whether slaves or free—and we were all given one Spirit to drink. 14 Indeed, the body is not one part but many. 15 If the foot should say, “Because I’m not a hand, I don’t belong to the body,” it is not for that reason any less a part of the body. 16 And if the ear should say, “Because I’m not an eye, I don’t belong to the body,” it is not for that reason any less a part of the body. 17 If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole body were an ear, where would the sense of smell be? 18 But as it is, God has arranged each one of the parts in the body just as he wanted. 19 And if they were all the same part, where would the body be? 20 As it is, there are many parts, but one body. 21 The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!” Or again, the head can’t say to the feet, “I don’t need you!”
Codes for a healthy family…

CODE #1: Acknowledge And Respect One Another’s Differences

<ILLUSTRATION>

Comparing your kids to one another

Data says:

Sibling comparison often leads to conflict and rivalries. Unresolved, these can have extensive consequences, including:

• Being perceived as someone who shows off and brags a lot
• Constantly competing for parental attention
• Pressuring parents to choose their side in sibling conflicts
• Failing to treat their siblings as adults and equals
• Treating their brothers and sisters as enemies
• Sabotaging their siblings’ lives, relationships, and work
• Belittling their siblings to make them feel inadequate

 

Corinthian Church was caught in a “COMPARISON TRAP“

• Prophecy
• Tongues
• Healing
• Faith
• Wisdom
• etc

Comparison leads to FAMILY CODE VIOLATIONS (Church or Family)

• Jealousy
• Bitterness
• Showboating

Family Examples:

• Husband and wife not working together leveraging strengths rather than focus on weakness
• We use our strengths to cover the other’s weaknesses
• Parents comparing kids — To one another, to themselves

Church Examples:

• Similar to the Corinthian church

 

So, Paul uses the example of the HUMAN BODY

• Many parts that work TOGETHER

1 Corinthians 12:24-26

Instead, God has put the body together, giving greater honor to the less honorable, 25 so that there would be no division in the body, but that the members would have the same concern for each other. 26 So if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members rejoice with it.
We celebrate differences
God is creative in his creation

• Places and people
• “No Jew/Gentile” No “Slave/free”
• One family

 

What is the primary way we overcome our differences and work together?

• How do we overcome comparison?

 

Paul Writes…

1 Corinthians 13

13 If I speak human or angelic tongues but do not have love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith so that I can move mountains but do not have love, I am nothing. 3 And if I give away all my possessions, and if I give over my body in order to boast but do not have love, I gain nothing.

4 Love is patient, (Uncomplaining, Long-suffering, Composed)

love is kind. (Generous, Considerate)

Love does not envy, (Not Resentful, Not Jealous)

is not boastful, (Not Puffed Up, Not Overbearing)

is not arrogant, (Not Full of yourself, Not Egotistical)

5 is not rude, (Polite, is Civil, Not “In your face”)

is not self-seeking, (Not Individualistic, Not selfish. It’s Mature)

is not irritable, (Not Testy, Not Grumpy, Not Whinny)

and does not keep a record of wrongs. (Ledger of past hurts)

6 Love finds no joy in unrighteousness but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Codes for a healthy family…

Code #2: Sacrificially Love One Another

Paul gives one of the best descriptions of CHRISTIAN LOVE

• This love is unique to Christians

Christian love is ACTIVE

• Not a feeling but a set of positive actions

Love does NOT always mean agreeing

• Our culture has highjacked the meaning of love

Love is COMPASSION, and CARE

• Telling someone they are wrong can be GREAT COMPASSION
• Done in love

Code Violations:

• Constant Impatience
• Continual Harshness
• Envy
• Constant Bragging
• Rudeness
• Always self-seeking
• Continual Irritability
• Always keeping a record of wrongs
• Bearing nothing
• Believing nothing
• Hoping nothing
• Enduring nothing

 

This passage sums up this series so well

1 Peter 2

1 Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice, all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and all slander. 2 Like newborn infants, desire the pure milk of the word, so that by it you may grow up into your salvation, 3 if you have tasted that the Lord is good. 4 As you come to him, a living stone—rejected by people but chosen and honored by God— 5 you yourselves, as living stones, a spiritual house, are being built to be a holy priesthood to offer spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ.

Blueprints | Quality Framing for Quality Families

Week 1: Blueprints for God’s Design of Family

The family is God’s blueprint for human flourishing

• Individuals and the church

 

Week 2: Laying The Foundation For Healthy Families

Biblical values form a strong foundation for healthy families

• Individuals and the church

Today is about:

Quality Framing for Quality Families
Framing is what gives the house…

• Structure
• Strength/resilience
• Holds up everything above it

This isn’t actually about building houses; it is about building STRONG, HEALTHY FAMILIES

 

Like houses, they also provide:

• Structure
• Strength/resilience
• Holds up everything above it

The framing that supports a healthy family is…

MATURITY

 

The reason we’re talking about maturity is because…

Maturity is modeled and grown in the FAMILY

 

Family is the primary place where maturity takes place

• Testing of maturity/quality

 

What is maturity?

Maturity is a learned QUALITY

Like a house that fell down — Lacked quality (Maturity)
Diamonds

• Pressure
• Time
• Tough
• Does not break
• It does not get affected by things around it

Quality takes time

Quality is INTENTIONAL
We have a quality problem when it comes to our culture

• Because we have a maturity problem

The Christian family and Church must reflect back the QUALITY of Christian maturity to the culture that surrounds it

• Instead of the culture reflected in the family and church

 

Paul to the Corinthians

• Colony of Rome
• A melting Pot of culture
• A key aspect to the city was The Temple of Aphrodite
• Many new Christian families were acting like they were before following Jesus

“On the summit of this steep mountain stood the temple of Aphrodite, a symbol of the lust which pervaded the mind of the city”
Paul writes to correct and focuses on CHRISTIAN MATURITY
1 Corinthians 1

26 Brothers and sisters, consider your calling: Not many were wise from a human perspective, not many powerful, not many of noble birth. 27 Instead, God has chosen what is foolish in the world to shame the wise, and God has chosen what is weak in the world to shame the strong. 28 God has chosen what is insignificant and despised in the world—what is viewed as nothing—to bring to nothing what is viewed as something, 29 so that no one may boast in his presence. 30 It is from him that you are in Christ Jesus, who became wisdom from God for us—our righteousness, sanctification, and redemption— 31 in order that, as it is written: Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord.

 

1: Christian Maturity is the Quality of Humility

• Choosing to be humble or get humbled

Maturity is the ability to “GET OVER YOURSELF”

 

A Child is SELFISH

• My toy
• My Feelings over yours

We don’t give into CHILDISH SELFISHNESS; we teach MATURE SELFLESSNESS

 

A selfish person is an IMMATURE person

• They only take from those around them
• They don’t have maturity
• Bring harm to those in a relationship with them

 

God can’t work with prideful hearts because they are a part of IMMATURE people

 

As families, we teach HUMILITY to one another

 

Peter says this about humility

1 Peter 5:5-7

5 In the same way, you who are younger (immature), be subject to the elders. All of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because “God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble.” 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you at the proper time, 7 casting all your cares on him, because he cares about you.

 

1 Corinthians 3:1-4

3 For my part, brothers and sisters, I was not able to speak to you as spiritual people but as people of the flesh, as babies in Christ. 2 I gave you milk to drink, not solid food, since you were not yet ready for it. In fact, you are still not ready, 3 because you are still worldly. For since there is envy and strife among you, are you not worldly and behaving like mere humans? 4 For whenever someone says, “I belong to Paul,” and another, “I belong to Apollos,” are you not acting like mere humans?

5 What then is Apollos? What is Paul? They are servants through whom you believed, and each has the role the Lord has given (God’s Blueprints). 6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the growth. 7 So, then, neither the one who plants nor the one who waters is anything, but only God who gives the growth. 8 Now he who plants and he who waters are one, and each will receive his own reward according to his own labor. 9 For we are God’s coworkers. You are God’s field, God’s building.

10 According to God’s grace that was given to me, I have laid a foundation (values) as a skilled master builder, and another builds on it. But each one is to be careful how he builds on it. 11 For no one can lay any foundation other than what has been laid down. That foundation is Jesus Christ.

2: Christian Maturity is the Quality of Right Priorities

 

Learning to take care of your body as you get older

“If I knew then what I know now…”
Christian Maturity is KNOWING WHAT REALLY MATTERS

• In life
• To our faith
• To us corporately
• To us individually

The Corinthians were arguing over things that DON’T MATTER

• Who was taught by who
• Who was a better teacher
• Who was baptized by who

 

Paul teaches that this was a SIGN of their IMMATURITY

• Focus on what matters

 

A healthy family (Church or individual) teaches WHAT REALLY MATTERS

• People over things
• Purpose over pleasure
• Forgiveness over bitterness
• Generosity over jealousy
• Etc

 

1 Corinthians 10:23-24

23 “Everything is permissible,” but not everything is beneficial. “Everything is permissible,” but not everything builds up. 24 No one is to seek his own good, but the good of the other person.

3: Christian Maturity is the Quality of Healthy Boundaries

 

How close to sinning can I actually be?

• Try to rationalize all sorts of things…

Immaturity thinking says…

“How close to sinning can I get without actually sinning?”

Maturity says…

“Does this bring glory to God and benefit to those I lead around me?
Paul’s answer is…

1 Corinthians 10

31 So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God. 32 Give no offense to Jews or Greeks or the church of God, 33 just as I also try to please everyone in everything, not seeking my own benefit, but the benefit of many, so that they may be saved.
Healthy boundaries is the MATURITY to say NO

1. To certain people
2. To situations
3. To yourself

 

A sign of Immaturity is SELFISHNESS

• A child does not know healthy boundaries

 

So, using our instructions from Paul, how can we build environments that PROMOTE MATURITY?
Raising Mature Kids:

1: Your kids can’t grow past your maturity level

• Make sure you are pursuing maturity

2: Teach how to exercise SELFLESSNESS

• Humility

3: Clear Expectations

• Submission to authority
• Value of hard work
• How to forgive and be forgiven

4: Consistency of Teaching
Deuteronomy 6

6 These words that I am giving you today are to be in your heart. 7 Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

 

Maturity for Couples:

1: Submitting to one another

• Healthy Submission

 

2: Be willing to be challenged
3: Open and clear communication

• Healthy communication is a clear sign of maturity

4: Seeking restoration vs revenge

• Accepting compromise rather than compliance

 

For Individuals:

1: Choosing Right Opportunities
2: Choosing life-giving relationships

• Friends
• Dating

 

It is better to be alone than with someone who makes you miserable

 

Final Call for Christian Maturity

Hebrews 6

1 Therefore, let us leave the elementary teaching about Christ and go on to maturity, not laying again a foundation of repentance from dead works, faith in God, 2 teaching about ritual washings, laying on of hands, the resurrection of the dead, and eternal judgment.

Blueprints | Laying The Foundation For Healthy Families

Series:

Blueprints: God’s Design for Church and Family

 

Last week:

The family is God’s blueprint for human flourishing

• Immediate Family
• God’s Family of Redeemed Humanity (CHURCH)

As the family goes, so goes the culture

• Place of Societal Stability

The enemy Hates the Family

• Because it is a blessing from God

God used marriage and family as a METAPHOR for his relationship with His Church

• Bride of Christ
• God has and is redeeming the concept of the family

 

This leads us to…

LAYING THE FOUNDATION FOR HEALTHY FAMILIES

 

What are values?

Values: Ideas and behaviors that are important to a person or group of people

Values demonstrate who we are

We ALL value something
Culture is a combination of values

• The highway that leads us to flourish or decay

Jesus teaches about values in this way…

Matthew 7

24 “Therefore, everyone who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man who built his house on the rock. 25 The rain fell, the rivers rose, and the winds blew and pounded that house. Yet it didn’t collapse, because its foundation was on the rock. 26 But everyone who hears these words of mine and doesn’t act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. 27 The rain fell, the rivers rose, the winds blew and pounded that house, and it collapsed. It collapsed with a great crash.”

 

Jesus teaches that all values ARE NOT created equal

 

Our culture currently operates from a…

Desire Driven Values:

Desire creates my truth from within myself; thus, everyone around me must align to MY values

• Emotions driven by desire lead to the truth that governs my life

 

The values of our SECULAR Culture

Individuality: How we view identity and personal value

• I am my own authority
• I choose who and what I am
• The individual overrides the collective

Moral autonomy: How we view shame and repentance

• I do as I choose and cannot be judged
• The only one who can make me feel shame is myself
• Shame is an abuse of the power of others over my life and is harmful to me

Power Projection: How we view protection and authority

• Race, wealth, government, sexes, individual communities)
• The “oppressed now has the right to oppress the oppressor)
• Victim mentality gives power
• Might makes right

 

How do these things work themselves out?

Galatians 5

19 Now the works of the flesh are obvious: (aka… Values of secular Culture) sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatreds, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambitions, dissensions, factions, 21 envy, drunkenness, carousing, and anything similar. I am warning you about these things—as I warned you before—that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.
Do these values lead to FLOURISHING in the following examples?

• For mom and dad?
• For kids?
• Friends?

This leads to decay… NOT flourishing

 

Christian Family Values (Blueprint)

Spirit & Truth Driven Values:

Objective truth is outside of myself; thus, I must align my life with its values

• Within the boundaries of God, our Lord and Creator

What are some Christian values?

Galatians 5

22 But the fruit of the Spirit (Spirit & Truth Values) is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. The law is not against such things. 24 Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires.

 

Do these values lead to FLOURISHING in the following examples?

• For mom and dad?
• For kids?
• Friends?

This leads to FLOURISHING and BLESSINGS… NOT Decay/brokenness

• They can help put broken things back together

 

2 major problems when it comes to values…

Problem #1: Assuming values

 

Parents assuming that you knew something you didn’t

• A tradition
• A rule

Assuming is one of the BIGGEST enemies of teaching VALUES

• where there is uncertainty, there is confusion

Problem #2: Situational Values

• Lying is bad unless I need to do it
• Gossiping is bad about me unless I know something you need to
• Speeding is wrong unless it’s I’m in a hurry
• Sex outside of marriage is wrong… unless you’ve been married before
• Being generous is good unless I don’t think they deserve it

The values we typically possess are the ones that are most convenient for us at a specific moment

• If that are, then they are NOT Biblical Values

 

Losing the “moral high ground” with your kids because of your decisions

• Divorce and dating with kids

How do we make sure the correct values are being valued?

1: Values are TAUGHT and MODELED

Proverbs 22:6

6 Start a youth out on his way; even when he grows old he will not depart from it.

 

Family Values

• Teaching the next generation the challenges and values of the culture vs the values of the kingdom
• Parents to kids, mentors
• Taught at home, Church is a reinforcement of those values

We often overprotect our kids in real life and underprotect them online

• Set up safeguards so that you are not battling outside values before your child is ready

The POWER of a mentor

• Kids can brush off their parents, but the power of an outside agent giving the same information is a powerful resource
• Single Parents

Values are Reinforced in COMMUNITY

• Why church is so important
• You and your kids will value the values of their most CONSISTENT CONTACTS
• “Show me your friends, I’ll show you your future”

 

2: Values are REINFORCED

Through Discipline

 

Starting a new job

• Value stated = Respecting one another
• Value demonstrated = Gossip, taking credit for others work, lying
• The values that are reinforced are the REAL VALUES

Discipline is the reinforcement of our values

• Discipline (Tough Love)

 

Hebrews 12

3 For consider him who endured such hostility from sinners against himself, so that you won’t grow weary and give up. 4 In struggling against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. 5 And you have forgotten the exhortation that addresses you as sons: My son, do not take the Lord’s discipline lightly or lose heart when you are reproved by him,

6 for the Lord disciplines the one he loves and punishes every son he receives. 7 Endure suffering as discipline: God is dealing with you as sons. For what son is there that a father does not discipline? 8 But if you are without discipline—which all receive—then you are illegitimate children and not sons. 9 Furthermore, we had human fathers discipline us, and we respected them. Shouldn’t we submit even more to the Father of spirits and live? 10 For they disciplined us for a short time based on what seemed good to them, but he does it for our benefit, so that we can share his holiness. 11 No discipline seems enjoyable at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.

 

Healthy discipline is ALWAYS from a place of love

• Discipline is training

 

Proverbs 13:24

The one who will not use the rod hates his son, but the one who loves him disciplines him diligently.

 

Parental Discipline

• Consistency
• Raising kids you actually like
• Outside influence (community)
• Having a GOAL for your kid’s behaviors

 

Church Discipline

• Much “church hurt” was actually “church discipline”
• Discipline for Adults
• Kids who were never disciplined can’t handle healthy discipline when grown

 

Christian Discipline is gentle, clear, and consistent

• Without discipline, there can be no restoration, humility, forgiveness

 

Discipline vs Punishment

• Correction vs Condemnation
• Conviction vs Condemnation
• Condemnation leads to the dark; Conviction leads to the light

 

Family Ministries at Cornerstone

• Teaches values that you may not know
• You want them there for their own sake

Healthy discipline is a practice of humility

• On the part of the one receiving discipline
• On the part of the one GIVING discipline

Mentorship = Investment into the next generation

• Mentorship and Discipline

Values Form the Foundation for us:

• Individually
• Collectively
• As Christians

 

Let’s make sure the values we have are CHRISTIAN FAMILY VALUES

Blueprints | More Than Blood

Blueprints set a STANDARD

• How it should be

When blueprints aren’t followed, disaster happens

 

That’s what this series is about…

Blueprints

God’s design for church and family
God is a God of design
Psalm 8:3-4

3 When I observe your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you set in place, 4 what is a human being that you remember him, a son of man that you look after him?
A MAJOR THEME in the story the Bible is telling is:

 

Let’s first define Family:

A family consists of people, usually related, with shared values that provide safety, guidance, accountability, respect, and forgiveness.

 

Let’s build a BIBLICAL THEME of Family…

1: God planned and placed the family at the beginning of creation

Genesis 2:24

This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds with his wife, and they become one flesh.

2: God designed the family for human flourishing

Genesis 1:28

God blessed them, and God said to them, “Be fruitful, multiply, fill the earth, and subdue it. Rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, and every creature that crawls on the earth.”

3: The enemy of God hates family

Genesis 4

8 Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.” And while they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him. 9 Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is your brother Abel?” “I don’t know,” he replied. “Am I my brother’s guardian?”
The enemy always tries to mimic and distort to eventually destroy anything g that God has created for our good

4: God has chosen to redeem the world through a family

Genesis 12

12 The Lord said to Abram: Go from your land, your relatives, and your father’s house to the land that I will show you. 2 I will make you into a great nation, I will bless you, I will make your name great, and you will be a blessing. 3 I will bless those who bless you, I will curse anyone who treats you with contempt, and all the peoples on earth will be blessed through you.

 

What does all this mean?
To God, Family is a BIG DEAL

• His blueprint for human flourishing and happiness is through Family

Some Examples:

Father vs. Absent Fathers

• According to the U.S. Census Bureau, 17.8 million children, nearly 1 in 4, live without a biological, step, or adoptive father in the home.

No father:

Research shows that when a child is raised in a father-absent home, they are affected in the following ways…

• Greater Risk of Poverty
• More Likely to Have Behavioral Problems
• Greater Risk of Infant Mortality
• More Likely to Go to Prison More Likely to Commit Crime
• More Likely to Become Pregnant as a Teen
• More Likely to Face Abuse and Neglect
• More Likely to Abuse Drugs and Alcohol
• More Likely to Suffer Obesity
• More Likely to Drop Out of School

Kids:

Children with involved fathers have a strong foundation for child well-being. They are at lower risk for…

• Infant Mortality Low Birth Weight
• Emotional and Behavioral Problems
• Neglect and Abuse
• Injury
• Obesity
• Poor School Performance
• Teen Pregnancy
• Incarceration as Juveniles
• Alcohol and Substance Abuse
• Criminal Activity
• Suicide

Mom:

Mothers with active fathers in the home…

• More likely to receive prenatal care
• Less likely to smoke during pregnancy
• Healthier births
• Lower risk of post-partum stress & depression
• Lower parenting stress
• More leisure time
• Higher marital satisfaction

(All info taken from https://www.fatherhood.org)
Healthy Families lead to HUMAN FLOURISHING

 

Why?

Because it’s God’s blueprint

I don’t think anyone has a problem with this, but it is INCOMPLETE in scripture’s view of FAMILY…

 

5: Jesus has come, and not only is our savior but also our BROTHER

Hebrews 2

11 For the one who sanctifies and those who are sanctified all have one Father. That is why Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters, 12 saying: I will proclaim your name to my brothers and sisters; I will sing hymns to you in the congregation.
Because we belong to Christ, we belong to his family

6: The church is a family and the Bride of Christ

Ephesians 5

22 Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, 23 because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of the body. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word.

31 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. 32 This mystery is profound, but I am talking about Christ and the church.
God has EXPANDED the understanding of FAMILY

• Not just “DAD, MOM, KIDS
• The Bible doesn’t have a category for that

Sermon Title:

More than Blood
Here’s where there is trouble for us…
Family as an INDIVIDUAL INSTITUTION

• Me and mine vs you and yours
• Instead, it is US/WE

Personal Family is important, and so is the FAMILY OF FAITH

• Christian Family
• Church Family

The Reality

• We will spend eternity with our FAITH FAMILY, not necessarily our BLOOD relatives
• God’s family is MORE THAN BLOOD

 

How did this work out in the New Testament?

 

Summarization of the Reason for the letter:

• Written to Philemon by Paul
• A resident of Colosse (Colossians)
• He held church as his house
• He had a Slave named Onesimus (oh NESS in muss)
• Onesimus stole money and ran away
• Met Paul and became a Christian

 

Listen for the “family language”

Philemon 1

1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother:

To Philemon our dear friend and coworker, 2 to Apphia our sister, to Archippus our fellow soldier, and to the church that meets in your home. 3 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

4 I always thank my God when I mention you in my prayers, 5 because I hear of your love for all the saints and the faith that you have in the Lord Jesus. 6 I pray that your participation in the faith may become effective through knowing every good thing that is in us for the glory of Christ. 7 For I have great joy and encouragement from your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother.

8 For this reason, although I have great boldness in Christ to command you to do what is right, 9 I appeal to you, instead, on the basis of love. I, Paul, as an elderly man and now also as a prisoner of Christ Jesus, 10 appeal to you for my son, Onesimus. I became his father while I was in chains. 11 Once he was useless to you, but now he is useful both to you and to me. 12 I am sending him back to you—I am sending my very own heart. 13 I wanted to keep him with me, so that in my imprisonment for the gospel he might serve me in your place. 14 But I didn’t want to do anything without your consent, so that your good deed might not be out of obligation, but of your own free will. 15 For perhaps this is why he was separated from you for a brief time, so that you might get him back permanently, 16 no longer as a slave, but more than a slave—as a dearly loved brother. He is especially so to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.

17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would me. 18 And if he has wronged you in any way, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—not to mention to you that you owe me even your very self. 20 Yes, brother, may I benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ. 21 Since I am confident of your obedience, I am writing to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say.

 

God’s plan is still the same…. To redeem the world through family

• Through those who are a part of His REDEEMED family

 

What should we take away from this?

1: Family is a BIG DEAL to God

• We should make it a big deal in our lives, too
• We treat it with respect

2: God’s vision for the world is a RENEWED FAMILY

• With Christ as our king

3: You and your family flourish MOST when a part of God’s REDEEMED FAMILY

• Your family flourishes through its activity in the church family
• Single
• Older – no kids

 

You no longer need to feel lonely because you have a LARGE family

• You no longer need to feel threatened because you are a family that protects
• You have a part to play because everyone takes part in a healthy family

Fully Worth The Cost

Usually, when we think of “COST,” it’s money

• a product “costs” us “Blank amount of dollars.”

But there is a more profound COST

• What it takes to get the money in the first place

Let’s look a place where Jesus explains the concept

Luke 14:26-33

26 “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, and even his own life—he cannot be my disciple. 27 Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple.

28 “For which of you, wanting to build a tower, doesn’t first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? 29 Otherwise, after he has laid the foundation and cannot finish it, all the onlookers will begin to ridicule him, 30 saying, ‘This man started to build and wasn’t able to finish.’
What is a way for us to understand this “COST”

Cost = Time + Energy

• The greater the “COST,” the greater the investment of our TIME and our ENERGY

<Example>

Holding the door for a stranger vs. A first date

First Date vs 50th wedding anniversary
Other examples:

Work – Get money

What is the COST?

Cost = time+energy
Kids – Raise the next generation

Cost = time+energy
Friendships – not lonely

Cost = Time + Energy
The cost of following Jesus

• death to self

 

Let’s talk about 2 COSTS the Bible teaches are WORTH THE COST.

 

1: Cost of Character

What is character?

Character: The strength of moral fiber.

“As the excellence of gold is its purity and the excellence of art is its beauty, so the excellence of man is his character”

• “What you do in the dark”
• When no one is watching
• When there is no consequence

Character is the sum of our:

• disposition
• thoughts
• intentions
• desires
• actions

It is good to remember general tendencies gauge character

• Not based on a few isolated actions
• We must look at the whole life

Why is there a “COST” to character
Because character is DEVELOPED

• it’s learned

It’s through REDEEMED HEARTS
Like the refining of metals

• God REFINES OUR HEARTS

Proverbs 17:3

3 A crucible for silver, and a smelter for gold, and the Lord is the tester of hearts.
How do we DEVELOP Character?

Romans 5

5 Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. 2 We have also obtained access through him by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we boast in the hope of the glory of God. 3 And not only that, but we also boast in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, 4 endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. 5 This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.
Cost of Character is this:

• Cost = Time + Energy

Time:

• Suffering
• Affliction
• Hardships

Energy:

• Boasting in God
• trusting in God
• Not trying to fix it ourselves

 

The cost of Godly Character is FAITH IN SUFFERING

• We trust God when things are hard
• We do what is righteous even when it’s incredibly hard
• We are morally obligated to God’s law even when no one is looking

Paul is not the only one who teaches us this…

1 Peter 1:6-8

6 You rejoice in this, even though now for a short time, if necessary, you suffer grief in various trials 7 so that the proven character of your faith—more valuable than gold which, though perishable, is refined by fire—may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.
Why is this so IMPORTANT to the Christian believer?

You cannot outrun your character

• Judas
• Saul

Proverbs 10:9

The one who lives with integrity lives securely, but whoever perverts his ways will be found out.
Proverbs 11:3

The integrity of the upright guides them, but the perversity of the treacherous destroys them.

 

2: Cost of Wisdom

 

What is Wisdom?

Wisdom:

Understanding and applying God’s moral law for the universe through right choices

Where does wisdom come from?

Proverbs 9:10-11

10 “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding. 11 For by me your days will be many, and years will be added to your life.
This is the SOURCE of wisdom

• Jesus, “I am the way, the TRUST, and the life…”
• Jesus is the source of wisdom

Humanities wisdom is foolish compared to the wisdom of God
Adam and Eve – Knowledge of “GOOD AND BAD”

• Cannot be gotten outside of God

Proverbs 4:10-15,23-27

10 Listen, my son. Accept my words, and you will live many years. 11 I am teaching you the way of wisdom; I am guiding you on straight paths. 12 When you walk, your steps will not be hindered; when you run, you will not stumble. 13 Hold on to instruction; don’t let go. Guard it, for it is your life. 14 Keep off the path of the wicked; don’t proceed on the way of evil ones. 15 Avoid it; don’t travel on it. Turn away from it, and pass it by.

23 Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life. 24 Don’t let your mouth speak dishonestly, and don’t let your lips talk deviously. 25 Let your eyes look forward; fix your gaze straight ahead. 26 Carefully consider the path for your feet, and all your ways will be established. 27 Don’t turn to the right or to the left; keep your feet away from evil.

 

The Cost of wisdom is choosing to give…

Time – Learning wisdom

• we are NOT born with wisdom; it is acquired

Energy – Applying it regularly in your life

• Those who learn wisdom must guard it

 

How do we do this?

By asking good questions

 

In light of my past, my current circumstances, and my future hopes and dreams, what is the wise thing for me to do?

 

<Examples>

• Should I go there?
• Should I date them?
• Should I spend money on this?
• Should I agree to this?

 

How do we get wisdom?

James 1:5

5 Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God—who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly—and it will be given to him.

 

Character consistently chooses the right thing, and wisdom is knowing what the right thing is

• Godly Character and Wisdom are FULLY WORTH THE COST

Why Do Bad Things Happen To Good People?

Suffering

• we have all experienced it
• Some of us are going through it

 

Today – Going to approach it this way

1st: A Christian THEOLOGY of Suffering

• What does the Bible teach, and how is that different than other perspectives

 

2nd: A Pastoral Response

• How we can walk through really difficult times

Let’s look at the IDEA of suffering

When Bad people do bad things, bad things should happen to them

• Karma
• You get when you deserve

 

But what about when Bad things happen to GOOD PEOPLE?

• Child gets sick
• Stolen from
• Natural Disasters

This is what is called in philosophy:

THE PROBLEM OF EVIL

Most suffering comes from evil or can be seen as evil

 

Let’s look at it from a few different perspectives…

 

BUDDISM

• We suffer because we are too attached to worldly things. Buddhism urges us to get past suffering by not clinging to material objects or even to relationships with other people.
• Buddhists say that a desire for things and relationships is what causes us to suffer.

 

HINDUISM

• Suffering is regarded as punishment for deeds done in a previous life. To the Hindu, a great deal of suffering is simply accumulated “karma” catching up with people. In Hindu thinking, the upside is that by “settling accounts” and paying for past misdeeds, the soul’s next reincarnation will be more enjoyable.
• Hindus say that pleasure cannot exist without pain.
• For Hindus, bliss and suffering are simply two sides of the same thing.

 

ISLAM

• See suffering as a way to submit to the will of Allah. Islam teaches that pain can lead us to repentance and then on to good deeds.
• Thus, one Muslim response to suffering is to focus on the rewards promised in Paradise.
• Islam’s emphasis on good works leads to the feeling that the more our lives please God, the less we will suffer.

 

ATHEISM/AGNOSTICISM

• We are just a biological result of blind, predetermined evolution, and thus, any perception of pain and suffering ultimately doesn’t matter because, ultimately, life and consciousness are an accident and will ultimately cease to exist in a distant future.

“The existentialist, on the contrary, finds it extremely embarrassing that God does not exist, for there disappears with Him all possibility of finding values in an intelligible heaven. There can no longer be any good a priori since there is no infinite and perfect consciousness to think it. It is nowhere written that “the good” exists, that one must be honest or must not lie, since we are now upon the plane where there are only men. Dostoevsky once wrote: “If God did not exist, everything would be permitted,” and that, for existentialism, is the starting point. Everything is indeed permitted if God does not exist…” ~ Jean-Paul Sartre, Existentialism is a Humanism

 

The Christian Answer to Evil is this…

Evil comes from rebellion against a GOOD God

Psalm 14:3

All have turned away; all alike have become corrupt. There is no one who does good, not even one.

 

Romans 3:23

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God
Both an ANGELIC rebellion and a HUMAN Rebellion
This is a result of God creating FREE WILLED CREATURES

In a universe of free will, there exists the possibility of turning away
This then brings up the question of…

So why doesn’t God just get rid of all Evil and suffering?

Here is a thought experiment…

If God were to get rid of all evil tonight at 12 AM, would you still be here at 12:01 AM?
To sum up this far…

1: Pain and suffering are the results of evil

2: Evil is rebellion against a Good God

3: Rebellion is a result of free will
So now, let’s change gears and look at suffering and Evil from a pastoral response perspective…
Let’s answer the question:

When bad things happen, what should we do?

1: When bad things happen, we Look ahead

 

2 Corinthians 4:16–18

16 Therefore we do not give up. Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day. 17 For our momentary light affliction is producing for us an absolutely incomparable eternal weight of glory. 18 So we do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.
Looking forward to Vacation Views

• Nobody vacations to look at a brick wall or alley
• “Look at this parking lot…”
• “Look at this dead patch of grass…”
• “Look at this clean gas station bathroom…”

 

We go because the “VIEWS” remind us of a TRANSCENDENT BEAUTY
Regardless of how INCREDIBLE the view… It is incomparable to the worst view in heaven

 

Christians have an eternal perspective:

We do not lose heart
Bad things may happen to good people in this world, but this world is not the end

• Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day

1 Peter 1

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Because of his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead 4 and into an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you. 5 You are being guarded by God’s power through faith for a salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 You rejoice in this, even though now for a short time, if necessary, you suffer grief in various trials 7 so that the proven character of your faith—more valuable than gold which, though perishable, is refined by fire—may result in praise, glory, and honor at the revelation of Jesus Christ.

 

For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all

• We fix our eyes not on what is seen but on what is unseen

 

<<There is another way we look AHEAD>>
Story of Joseph
Genesis 50:19–20

19 But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? 20 You planned evil against me; God planned it for good to bring about the present result—the survival of many people.

 

Bad things happen to good people, but God uses those bad things for an ultimate, lasting good.

• “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”
• When Joseph, innocent of wrongdoing, finally came through his horrific sufferings, he was able to see God’s good plan in it all

Romans 8:28

28 We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God, who are called according to his purpose.

 

2: When bad things happen, we look back

 

2 Corinthians 1:3–5

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort. 4 He comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any kind of affliction, through the comfort we ourselves receive from God. 5 For just as the sufferings of Christ overflow to us, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.

 

Horatio G. Spafford

• Successful lawyer and businessman in Chicago in the Late 1800s
• Wife Anna and 5 children
• Lost youngest son to pneumonia and much of their business in the Great Chicago of 1871 (same year)
• Rebuild some of the business
• Sent his wife and 4 daughters to England for vacation, planning to join them shortly (1873)
• A terrible accident happened with their ship sinking
• Only Anna Survived
• Wrote him a letter that said, “Saved alone, what shall I do?”
• Horatio sailed to his morning wife
• On the way, he wrote this…

When peace like a river attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll, Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul.

 

How many have sung that song in the midst of their sorrow
Philippians 4:7

7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.
The hardest seasons of life produce the greatest anointing

 

Bad things happen to good people, but those bad things equip believers for deeper ministry.

 

Those with battle scars can better help those going through battles

• God has strengthened us so we can strengthen another

 

3: When we go through bad things, we look Up

1 Peter 2:20–23

20 For what credit is there if when you do wrong and are beaten, you endure it? But when you do what is good and suffer, if you endure it, this brings favor with God. 21 For you were called to this, because Christ also suffered for you, leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps. 22 He did not commit sin, and no deceit was found in his mouth; 23 when he was insulted, he did not insult in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten but entrusted himself to the one who judges justly.

 

Suffering is WEIGHTY

• It’s heavy
• It causes us to look DOWN

But I want to challenge you today to LOOK UP… TO THE CROSS
Bad things happen to good people…

But the worst things happened to the best Person

• Jesus was the only truly Righteous One, yet He suffered more than we can imagine
• Jesus is no stranger to our pain.

 

On the Cross, Christ suffered the EVIL of the WORLD

• ALL OUR SIN
• All our shame
• All our rebellion

 

The answer can’t be that He doesn’t care

He plunged himself into suffering with us!

 

We follow in His footsteps

“If you suffer for doing good and you endure it, this is commendable before God. To this you were called, because Christ suffered for you,…”

 

If you are suffering today…

LOOK AHEAD… To the promise of Eternity with God

LOOK BACK… To how God has strengthened us so we can strengthen another

LOOK UP... To the suffering Savior, who suffers with us and understands our pain

---

Resources for further study:

“The Problem of Pain” by C. S. Lewis https://a.co/d/a67XNuk

“Walking with God through Pain and Suffering” by Timothy Keller https://a.co/d/dDwbJWV

“Suffering Is Never for Nothing” by Elisabeth Elliot https://a.co/d/fE5fJ6v

“Suffering: Gospel Hope When Life Doesn’t Make Sense by Paul David Tripp https://a.co/d/eKELCmH

Vision Sunday 2024

Cornerstone is a church “ON MISSION”

• We don’t exist to exist; we exist to accomplish something

 

Cornerstone’s Mission: We exist…

To Help DISCONNECTED People to Find, Follow, and Be Like Jesus

• The word DISCONNECTED is key…

As students of our culture, we must understand what is currently going on in our culture

 

One of the most significant issues facing Americans is:

LONELINESS

Facts on Loneliness:

• According to a study by Cigna, nearly half of all Americans report feeling lonely sometimes or always.
• The same study found that Generation Z (ages 18-22) is the loneliest generation, with 79% reporting feelings of loneliness.
• Social isolation is as harmful to health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
• Loneliness can increase the risk of premature death by up to 50%.

 

All indications point to the fact that our culture is:

• More DISCONNECTED than ever

Why?

The reasons behind this epidemic include the prevalence of smaller and further-flung families, the decline in traditional social institutions such as faith organizations, an increasingly individualistic culture, technology, and social media. ~ Reporter Dan Minchin

 

Our culture has torn down many of the social institutions and habits that once formed a more healthy relational society

• No more front porches
• No more family reunions
• Social media is actually less social
• Church attendance decline

 

Many experts are now arguing that it is actually the HABIT OF CHURCH that lies at the center of this crisis…
From an article titled: CAN RELIGION MAKE YOU HAPPY?

“People who do have a strong sense of religious practice in their life—they just tend to be happier,” he says.” They tend to be happier people. They have a greater sense of organization in their life. They have a better sense of community. They have an underlying physics to their life, and they’re not trying to figure things out in the same way. And life is complicated. There are things that are going to pull you in every direction all the time. And it’s nice to have something that you can actually count on, whether you agree with every single part of it or not.” ~ Arthur Brooks: Professor at the Harvard Business School

 

This shouldn’t surprise us

Genesis 2:18

Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper corresponding to him.”
So again, our MISSION is to…

HELP DISCONNECTED PEOPLE FIND, FOLLOW, AND BE LIKE JESUS

• Not just get them into the community… but point them to Jesus
• But community is a KEY part

 

The question then is: HOW

How do we go about and make this MISSION a reality?

CARE – CONNECT – CULTIVATE 

We want to be a church that…

• Connects all we can.
• Cares for all we’re sent.
• Cultivates all we have.

1: Connecting all we can

Walking into a room of strangers

• Seeing someone you know

If loneliness and isolation is a big problem

• Connection is the answer

Connecting takes intentionality

• doesn’t happen by accident

 

To be a connecting church, it will take…

A Missionary Mindset

• To reach our culture, we must think more like missionaries

Romans 10:14-15

14 How, then, can they call on him they have not believed in? And how can they believe without hearing about him? And how can they hear without a preacher? 15 And how can they preach unless they are sent? As it is written: How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news.

 

As a church, we are called to help the DISCONNECTED in our towns CONNECT with God and Christian Community

How can you do this?

Just finished a series on CALLING

• Who is God calling you to?

Make the effort to CONNECT with those around you

 

How is the church doing this?

Connect Process

Relational spaces

• Ministries
• Serving
• Groups

2: Caring for all we’re Sent

Care is POWERFUL

• It’s what people remember

 

Why is Care so important?

 

The “ONE ANOTHER” of Care in scripture
1 Thessalonians 5:11

11 Therefore encourage one another and build each other up as you are already doing.

 

John 13:14

14 So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet.
Romans 12:9-10

9 Let love be without hypocrisy. Detest evil; cling to what is good. 10 Love one another deeply as brothers and sisters. Take the lead in honoring one another. 
Romans 12:15-16

15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud; instead, associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own estimation.

 

Galatians 6:2

2 Carry one another’s burdens; in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.

 

Colossians 3:12-13

12 Therefore, as God’s chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, 13 bearing with one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a grievance against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you are also to forgive. 

 

1 Thessalonians 5:14-15

14 And we exhort you, brothers and sisters: warn those who are idle, comfort the discouraged, help the weak, be patient with everyone. 15 See to it that no one repays evil for evil to anyone, but always pursue what is good for one another and for all.

 

Caring is:

• Forgiving
• Serving
• Carrying
• Bearing
• Living in harmony
• Loving
• Encouraging

 

Connect to Care

• Tells us what others are in need of

How can you do this?

• Make the effort to be there for others
• Not just Facebook comments
• Go to hurting people

 

How is the church doing this?

• Care Ministry
• We care best for those who are CONNECTED

Lastly…

3: Cultivating All We Have

Being taught to “BE USEFUL”

• No one owes us anything, so learn to be someone others can count on
• What are you bringing to the table

 

This is at the heart of CULTIVATION

 

We are not just “SAVED FOR HEAVEN”

• Fire insurance Christianity
• If that is all you think it is, you may not be saved

 

This is what Jesus’ brother James wrote to the church…

James 2:14-18,26

14 What good is it, my brothers and sisters, if someone claims to have faith but does not have works? Can such faith save him?

15 If a brother or sister is without clothes and lacks daily food 16 and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, stay warm, and be well fed,” but you don’t give them what the body needs, what good is it? 17 In the same way faith, if it does not have works, is dead by itself.

18 But someone will say, “You have faith, and I have works.”[a] Show me your faith without works, and I will show you faith by my works. 19 You believe that God is one. Good! Even the demons believe—and they shudder. 26 For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.

 

True Christian faith GROWS

• It’s an action and a trajectory

If our faith is a growing plant, then the CHURCH is the GARDEN

• Cultivate every person we can
• Every age group
• Every life season

How can you do this?

Take OWNERSHIP of your faith

• Study scripture
• Be in community
• Be in church regularly
• Take part in the process

 

How is the church doing this?

>>Growth Tracks

• Kingdom Marriage
• Grief Share
• 84 Days – Men’s track

>>Serving the Church (Heroes)

Student Ministry

>>Mission Trips

>>Men’s/Women’s Ministries

 

We here at Cornerstone Church are committed to building a STRONG Christian community that produces healthy Christian people by CONNECTING all we can, by CARING for all we’re sent, and by CULTIVATING all we have for the advancement of the Kingdom of God.

Living With Purpose | Ignoring The Voices of Fear

Perspective:

What we see based on our circumstances

 

The reason I bring up perspective is…

This series has been all about “LIVING WITH PURPOSE”

What that purpose is will be determined by your PERSPECTIVE

 

In the first week, we learned the important foundational truths concerning our PURPOSE

God created the world ON PURPOSE and FOR A PURPOSE

 

The ULTIMATE PURPOSE for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is to GLORIFY GOD

Isaiah 43:7

…everyone who bears my name and is created for my glory. I have formed them; indeed, I have made them.”
Last week, we found out that we all have a PERSONAL CALLING

A personal calling is simply God’s tug on our hearts toward a particular thing. It can be for a specific situation, a season of life, or a lifetime. 

Finished last week with some best practices around finding out that calling
Acts 13

2 As they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” 3 Then after they had fasted, prayed, and laid hands on them, they sent them off.
Today, we are talking about one of the most difficult aspects of following your calling

Overcoming FEAR

 

Your calling will be out of your comfort zone…

 

Any time we are pulled out of our comfort zones, we will have to deal with fear

• Leaving things we like behind
• Meeting new people
• Changing locations
• Changing friends

 

Your calling will be out of your comfort zone but is accompanied by God’s peace and Provision

 

To help us understand this, I want us to think of fear as a VOICE IN OUR EAR

• This voice has some lies that it tells us

 

Voices of fear around calling:

Voice #1: I don’t have what it takes

 

Often in our calling… WE LIMIT WHAT WE BELIEVE GOD CAN GO THROUGH US

 

Let’s look at someone who experienced this

Moses:

• Raised in Egypt
• Ran away and, for 40 years, kept sheep
• Burning bush
• God calls Moses to go and free His people

Exodus 3

11 But Moses asked God, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and that I should bring the Israelites out of Egypt?” 12 He answered, “I will certainly be with you, and this will be the sign to you that I am the one who sent you: when you bring the people out of Egypt, you will all worship God at this mountain.”
Exodus 4

10 But Moses replied to the Lord, “Please, Lord, I have never been eloquent—either in the past or recently or since you have been speaking to your servant—because my mouth and my tongue are sluggish.”

 

Here is that voice of fear… “I DON’T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES…”

• I can’t do this
• I can’t overcome my issues
• I can’t speak well enough (Moses)

This is the WRONG PERSPECTIVE
11 The Lord said to him, “Who placed a mouth on humans? Who makes a person mute or deaf, seeing or blind? Is it not I, the Lord? 12 Now go! I will help you speak and I will teach you what to say.” 13 Moses said, “Please, Lord, send someone else.”

 

This voice of fear can be strong

• Moses talking to God in a bush on fire
• He begs God to send someone else

14 Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses, and he said, “Isn’t Aaron the Levite your brother? I know that he can speak well. And also, he is on his way now to meet you. He will rejoice when he sees you. 15 You will speak with him and tell him what to say. I will help both you and him to speak and will teach you both what to do.
This is what it means that God’s calling will be out of your comfort ZoneThis is what it means that God’s calling will be out of your comfort Zone
Fear can paralyze you

• It keeps you out of God’s will
• Miss out on God’s purpose for your life

 

Key Question:

How do we overcome this voice?

 

By understanding:

What we lack, God will provide

 

But this is IMPORTANT

God’s provision always FOLLOWS obedience

 

God is patient with our struggles

• See how patient he is with Moses
• Explains his power and authority
• Sends aid through Aaron

 

Don’t fall for the incorrect thinking that…

“God will never give you more than you can handle”

• This is wrong

A better way of thinking is…

“If you can handle it without God, then it’s not from God”

We get to see Moses mature as he follows God

• Leads the people for 40 years

 

At the end of his life, he gives Joshua and the people this wisdom…

Deuteronomy 31:6,8

6 Be strong and courageous; don’t be terrified or afraid of them. For the Lord your God is the one who will go with you; he will not leave you or abandon you.” 8 The Lord is the one who will go before you. He will be with you; he will not leave you or abandon you. Do not be afraid or discouraged.”
Follow Him… Trust Him… Seek Him

• And He will lead you

Voice #2: It’s not worth the trouble

 

Worth the trouble:

The benefits, outcomes, or results of an action or effort are sufficient to justify the time, energy, and difficulties involved in carrying it out.

 

We make this decision ALL THE TIME

• Is this conversation worth the trouble?
• Is this friendship…
• Is this job…
• Is apologizing…
• Is forgiving them…
• I’m trying to help…

Let’s look at a story about someone who felt the same way…

Jonah 1

1 The word of the Lord came to Jonah son of Amittai: 2 “Get up! Go to the great city of Nineveh and preach against it because their evil has come up before me.”
Jonah was a prophet of Israel

• God called him to go to Israel’s enemy, Nineveh

 

Here is how Jonah Responded…

3 Jonah got up to flee to Tarshish from the Lord’s presence. He went down to Joppa and found a ship going to Tarshish. He paid the fare and went down into it to go with them to Tarshish from the Lord’s presence.

 

This voice works because we want to stay comfortable

• Because we can be lazy

 

The way this voice often sounds is…

“I like where I am in life right now”

“God wants me to be happy, so he’s not calling me to do this”

“If I say yes, then everything in my life is going to change”

I don’t like them enough to help them
These are all the WRONG PERSPECTIVE
There are consequences when we say NO to the voice of God and listen to the voice of fear instead

• We don’t want to be out of God’s will

 

We will be “SWALLOWED UP” by CHAOS

Back to Jonah

• Swallowed by the great fish
• Spit out 3 days later
• Goes to Nineveh and preaches
• The city turns to God and repents

 

Jonah 4

2 He prayed to the Lord, “Please, Lord, isn’t this what I said while I was still in my own country? That’s why I fled toward Tarshish in the first place. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger, abounding in faithful love, and one who relents from sending disaster.

 

This is the God that Jonah was running from

He knew God would forgive them
It’s also why God didn’t destroy Jonah when he tried to run
How do we overcome this voice?
Hebrews 12:1-2

1 Therefore, since we also have such a large cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us lay aside every hindrance and the sin that so easily ensnares us. Let us run with endurance the race that lies before us, 2 keeping our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy that lay before him, he endured the cross, despising the shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.

 

I’m so glad that Jesus didn’t look at us and say…

• “They’re not worth the trouble”
• They are always messing up
• They are always hurting each other
• They are always hurting themselves

No…

He saw us at our WORST and still said, “THEY ARE WORTH IT”

Living With Purpose | Finding Your Personal Calling

Last week… Started a new series

LIVING WITH PURPOSE

 

Learned 2 important truths:

God created the world ON PURPOSE and FOR A PURPOSE

Which means…

The ULTIMATE PURPOSE for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is to GLORIFY GOD

 

Today, we are talking about the next step in purpose, which is…

• Finding Your Personal Calling

 

Separate into two parts:

Part 1: What do we mean by “PERSONAL CALLING”

 

A personal calling is simply God’s tug on our hearts toward a particular thing. It can be for a specific situation, a season of life, or a lifetime. 

Specific Situation

• At work
• With a person

 

Season of life

• Parenting (adoption)
• Marriage
• School
• College
• Job

Lifetime

• Full-time ministry
• Personal calling that takes your whole life

Let’s talk about what a calling is NOT

This means that a calling is NOT Necessarily…

• What is going to make you rich
• What is going to always make you happy
• What you are meant to do forever

 

>>But it DOES mean that you will find the MOST FULFILLMENT in your personal calling<<

Why is that?

Your Calling is a specific way to glorify God in your life

 

Remember what we have already said about everyone’s purpose…

• The ULTIMATE PURPOSE for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is to GLORIFY GOD

Your personal calling will help you be a part of the team to build God’s kingdom

• Don’t find your own calling in someone else’s calling

“Your calling isn’t about you; it’s about all the people that you’re going to impact.” ~ John Bevere

 

2 Thessalonians 1:11-12

11 In view of this, we always pray for you that our God will make you worthy of his calling, and by his power fulfill your every desire to do good and your work produced by faith, 12 so that the name of our Lord Jesus will be glorified by you, and you by him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.
1 Corinthians 10:31

31 So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do everything for the glory of God.
Your calling may or may not be your “JOB”

Your calling is your MINISTRY

• It can take many forms

 

Don’t need a bunch of “PASTORS.” We need Christian…

• Teachers
• Medical workers
• Scientists
• Engineers
• Mothers/Fathers

People who “DO EVERYTHING FOR THE GLORY OF GOD”

 

People who are passionate about doing what God has uniquely wired them to do

 

Another important point about calling…

Your calling will be out of your comfort zone but is accompanied by God’s peace and Provision

• Callings are not easy, but HARD/DIFFICULT

 

Your calling may cause you to…

• Go somewhere new
• Talk to people you don’t know
• Take risks that you can’t control

 

And ultimately…

Trust God like NEVER BEFORE

 

Philippians 4:7

7 And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

 

Lastly, what is a personal calling?…

Your Calling can often be seasonal, and each season teaches you what you need to know for the next

 

David being prepared for Goliath…

 

1 Samuel 17

32 David said to Saul, “Don’t let anyone be discouraged by him; your servant will go and fight this Philistine!”

33 But Saul replied, “You can’t go fight this Philistine. You’re just a youth, and he’s been a warrior since he was young.”

34 David answered Saul, “Your servant has been tending his father’s sheep. Whenever a lion or a bear came and carried off a lamb from the flock, 35 I went after it, struck it down, and rescued the lamb from its mouth. If it reared up against me, I would grab it by its fur, strike it down, and kill it. 36 Your servant has killed lions and bears; this uncircumcised Philistine will be like one of them, for he has defied the armies of the living God.” 37 Then David said, “The Lord who rescued me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will rescue me from the hand of this Philistine.” Saul said to David, “Go, and may the Lord be with you.”

 

David had CONFIDENCE because of God’s faithfulness in the past

• That season prepared him for the next

CONTENTMENT vs HOLY DISCONTENTMENT

• Contentment: Being OK where you are
• Holy Discontentment: Feeling of God calling you to a new place, but waiting on HIS TIMING…

 

Stay faithful where you are NOW, and God will be faithful in placing you where you NEED TO BE

Part 2: How do you find your calling

 

A few steps…

1: Seek God purposefully and intensely

Prayer and fasting
What is God pulling your heart to?

• People
• Problems
• Passions
• Gifts

1 Thessalonians 5:16-21

16 Rejoice always, 17 pray constantly, 18 give thanks in everything; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. 19 Don’t stifle the Spirit. 20 Don’t despise prophecies, 21 but test all things. Hold on to what is good.

 

James 1:5

5 Now if any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God—who gives to all generously and ungrudgingly—and it will be given to him.
Will include gifts and talents

• Can’t sing… probably not called to be a singer

 

It can be pretty obvious

• Student
• Parent

2: Seek Confirmation

• The role of the church family

 

Acts 13

2 As they were worshiping the Lord and fasting, the Holy Spirit said, “Set apart for me Barnabas and Saul for the work to which I have called them.” 3 Then after they had fasted, prayed, and laid hands on them, they sent them off.

 

3: Begin to operate in faith

 

Trust God in your calling

• Walk like David

Look for opportunities

 

This is one of the most important things you can do in your life

Living With Purpose | The Lullaby Of False Purpose

The Power of Lullabies

 

Pastor of Underground Church in Iran (Muslim Country)

“It seems to me that the church in the West is under some sort of satanic lullaby.”

 

New Series:

LIVING WITH PURPOSE

Next few weeks

Looking at how we Discover our purpose
Today, we will look at the Idea of Purpose from a 50,000-foot view

Title: THE LULLABY OF FALSE PURPOSE

 

To know your part in the plan, you need to understand the LARGER PLAN

We can’t understand our purpose outside of God’s larger purpose for all things

 

This is what we MUST know…

God created the world ON PURPOSE and FOR A PURPOSE

We are not an accident

 

On Purpose = You and this world are NO Accident

• You are not a mistake
• You have purpose because all of God’s creation has purpose

 

Genesis 1:27

So God created man in his own image; he created him in the image of God; he created them male and female.
For A Purpose = Why did God create the World

FOR HIS GLORY

 

Isaiah 43:6-7

6 Bring my sons from far away, and my daughters from the ends of the earth—

7 everyone who bears my name and is created for my glory. I have formed them; indeed, I have made them.”

 

That means:

The ULTIMATE PURPOSE for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is to GLORIFY GOD

 

This is where the Lullabies Come in

If your ultimate purpose is to Glorify God with your life, then our enemy wants to do anything he can to distract you from that purpose
What are some of the SATANIC LULLABIES in our current culture?

 

Satanic Lullaby of Happiness

As long as I am doing things that make me happy and feel good, then everything will be OK, and I will have purpose.

 

• Sexual gratification
• Laziness
• Over-eating
• Things that make us “FEEL GOOD”
• Addictions to substances and experiences

 

There is nothing wrong with “BEING HAPPY” unless that takes over priority

 

God’s purpose for your life is not to be HAPPY but to be HOLY and display His GLORY

 

Seeking pleasure only leads to FLEETING HAPPINESS

Seeking Holiness leads to FULFILLMENT and JOY
Ephesians 4

17 Therefore, I say this and testify in the Lord: You should no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thoughts. 18 They are darkened in their understanding, excluded from the life of God, because of the ignorance that is in them and because of the hardness of their hearts. 19 They became callous and gave themselves over to promiscuity for the practice of every kind of impurity with a desire for more and more. 20 But that is not how you came to know Christ, 21 assuming you heard about him and were taught by him, as the truth is in Jesus, 22 to take off your former way of life, the old self that is corrupted by deceitful desires, 23 to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, 24 and to put on the new self, the one created according to God’s likeness in righteousness and purity of the truth.

Satanic Lullaby of Power

As long as I am in charge or people who think like me are in charge, then everything will be OK, and I will have purpose.

• Political power
• Racial/national power

The Lie in the Garden

Genesis 3

4 “No! You will certainly not die,” the serpent said to the woman. 5 “In fact, God knows that when you eat it your eyes will be opened and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” 6 The woman saw that the tree was good for food and delightful to look at, and that it was desirable for obtaining wisdom. So she took some of its fruit and ate it…

 

The lullaby of power speaks to a part of us that WANTS to be in charge

• Wants to BE OUR OWN GODS

1 Peter 5

5 All of you clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because God resists the proud but gives grace to the humble. 6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, so that he may exalt you at the proper time, 7 casting all your cares on him, because he cares about you. 8 Be sober-minded, be alert. Your adversary the devil is prowling around like a roaring lion, looking for anyone he can devour. 9 Resist him, firm in the faith, knowing that the same kind of sufferings are being experienced by your fellow believers throughout the world.

Satanic Lullaby of Fame

As long as I can be popular and accepted by enough people, then everything will be OK, and I will have purpose
Most kids today want to be “YouTubers”

• Our culture highly values fame

Many may not want to be “MACRO FAMOUS”

We do like being “MICRO FAMOUS”

• Social Media

Fame is giving ownership of yourself to those who don’t know you

 

1 Samuel 15:24

24 Saul answered Samuel, “I have sinned. I have transgressed the Lord’s command and your words. Because I was afraid of the people, I obeyed them.

 

With fame, others become your master
This lullaby will tell you to…

• Do whatever
• Believe whatever
• Be Whatever
• Others think you should do/believe/be

 

Matthew 5:16

16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.

 

Satanic Lullaby of Accomplishment

As long as I can work hard to have the life that I want, then I will be worthwhile, everything will be OK, and I will have purpose
The American dream

• Wealth
• Success
• Status

 

“I can take care of myself”

“I did it MY way”

“I didn’t need ANYONE but me”
You can strive and strive, and you will still go to the grave the same as everyone else

 

Luke 12

16 Then he told them a parable: “A rich man’s land was very productive. 17 He thought to himself, ‘What should I do, since I don’t have anywhere to store my crops? 18 I will do this,’ he said. ‘I’ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones and store all my grain and my goods there.

19 Then I’ll say to myself, “You have many goods stored up for many years. Take it easy; eat, drink, and enjoy yourself.”’

20 “But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life is demanded of you. And the things you have prepared—whose will they be?’

21 “That’s how it is with the one who stores up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God.”

 

Mark 8:36

36 For what does it benefit someone to gain the whole world and yet lose his life?
Don’t pursue accomplishments for yourself but for God’s kingdom

• These accomplishments are eternal

 

Satanic Lullaby of Personal Goodness

As long as I do good and treat others good, that means that I am good, everything will be ok, and I will have purpose.

• Spirituality
• Religion
• Secular morality

 

Isaiah 64

All of us have become like something unclean, and all our righteous acts are like a polluted garment; all of us wither like a leaf, and our iniquities carry us away like the wind.

 

Personal goodness is a satanic lullaby
Instead, we pursue God’s righteousness by being renewed

Romans 12:2

2 Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God.
If the Pond is poisoned, then everything downstream of the pond will be poisoned as well

• We have been drinking poisoned water as a culture
• These lullabies are the poison

So, we start with the story the Bible is telling

The ULTIMATE PURPOSE for EVERYTHING and EVERYONE is to GLORIFY GOD

• You will not find true purpose outside of this

 

Are you allowing satanic lullabies to distract you from your purpose?